I think a lot about motivation, reasons, purpose. I’m not talking about revving yourself up to get a bunch of tasks done or power through a hard thing. We all do this on some level every day, just trying to make it. What I’m talking about when I say motivation, reason, and purpose, is: why do we do the things we do? Why do we make the choices we make?
We live in a world where we make decisions and choices constantly. A lot of them on auto-pilot, and when the outcome is good, many of us attribute it to God or luck (hashtag blessed, anyone?). But when the outcome’s not so good, like when you kept doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result? Or when you looked up from your endless list of tasks and thought, I’m still here? Who do you give credit to then? I don’t know about you, but my knee jerk is toward regret at these moments, and then kicking myself, and then hating myself.
Strong words, but they feel true in these moments. But, instead of doing that, what if you just ask yourself what was motivating you to go that way…and not this way? To make that choice and not this, or this one? What purpose were you serving when you did that thing that you may now wish you had never done? For what reason did you not listen to your intuition? Giving yourself the chance to reflect and understand your reasons opens the door to acceptance of whatever it was you did, and brings you more awareness of your purpose, and the person you want to be, moving forward.
How does this all relate to creativity? Well, that project that you started and abandoned…eighteen times. Or that project you finished, and never let anyone see, never mind even know that you had done it. Or that project you’ve been thinking about doing forever…and never actually do. Ask yourself why? Why don’t you start it? Why don’t you finish it? Why do you hide it? Honest answers to these questions can give you precious insights into what you believe about yourself, and your purpose, and what motivates you—and why. And then you can decide if these things are still serving your best self, or if it’s time make some revisions.
And now for, Name. That. Mood! I’m feeling determined, a little scary. Like that part in the movie where the victim will no longer be a victim, and instead is in a montage of planning and preparing for their escape…with a little marching band duel vibe on it. What do you think?
—MBF
NaNoWriMo+Mood Music Ep. 6